This week, our friends David and John left Toledo for a new chapter in Mexico.
Last night, our longtime dog sitter and friend Brian came over to pass out Halloween candy with us. He’s heading to South Korea for work for three years.
That’s a lot of change in one week. And I’m not even the one moving.
I can be happy for our friends and still wish they were going to be closer. I don’t want the people I care about to pass up a new chapter because it would be more convenient for me if they stayed.
But I’m going to miss having them around.
You can keep in touch from another country. You can make plans to visit. What changes is how much planning it takes to spend time together. An ordinary evening becomes something that requires a calendar, a flight and coordinating schedules.
The friendship is still there. Getting together becomes a different undertaking.
These are the big changes. We know they’re big while they’re happening. There are plans and departure dates. We have some time to understand that things are going to be different.
But what about all the little changes happening around them?
A product you like stops being made. A store closes. A restaurant you assumed would always be there is suddenly gone.
You weren’t looking for something new. You were perfectly happy with what you had.
Now you’re finding a replacement.
Obviously, a discontinued product isn’t the same as a friend moving to another country. But both remind you that the familiar parts of your life aren’t guaranteed to stay put.
Sometimes you don’t even know something has changed until you go looking for it. You’re just trying to buy the thing you always buy. You weren’t planning to research five alternatives and read reviews written by people who apparently received five completely different products.
You already made this decision once. You found something that worked. You’d prefer to keep buying it and get on with your day.
There’s a practical side to familiarity. You know what something costs. You know whether it works. You know what you like at a restaurant and whether a store is worth your time. Those small decisions are settled.
Then something changes, and they’re back on the list.
As a reseller, I see why people go looking for products that aren’t easy to find anymore. Sometimes they don’t want the new formula, the updated version or whatever replaced it. They want the thing they already know they like.
I get it.
I think that’s why the little stuff can bother us more than we expect. We’re rarely dealing with just one change. We’re dealing with it on top of everything else. Sometimes the discontinued product gets more of our frustration than it deserves.
The world does not check whether this is a convenient week for us to adjust to one more thing.
Of course, keeping everything exactly the same wouldn’t work either. We’d miss out on new places, better products and opportunities we actually want. Some of the best changes in our lives start with deciding we don’t want things to stay the way they are.
It’s easier to appreciate that when you’re the person choosing.
When someone else is making the choice, even for good reasons, you’re left figuring out what it changes for you. You can understand the decision completely and still need some time to get used to it.
I don’t think every familiar thing was better. I don’t want to become someone who insists everything used to be good and now nothing is. There were lousy restaurants back then, too.
But there is comfort in knowing what to expect. The people nearby. The places still open. The small parts of a day that don’t require a new plan.
This week has made me notice those things a little more.
David and John are starting their next chapter in Mexico. Brian will soon be off to South Korea. Their lives are changing in big, exciting ways, and ours will feel a little different because of it.
Last night, though, Brian was here passing out Halloween candy with us.
I’m glad we had that evening.